Episode #60 Building Self-Compassion – Intentional Living

Hey friends! Today we're talking about engaging in an intentional lifestyle with God. Being mindful of him and engaging with him in these uncommon conversations in everyday life moments. And the question that I have for you today is what would it look like if you became your own best friend?

Now that might be kind of an interesting or awkward thought to think about, but we're talking today about this idea of self-compassion and the way that we treat ourselves, think of ourselves, and even talk to ourselves. And if you think about what it would look like for you to be your own best friend, I wonder what that would change in how you do those things.

If you became your own best friend, how would that change how you thought about your best friend, how you talked to them, how you approached them, how you treated them, what you believed about them?

I've shared a little bit in past podcast episodes, but this idea of self-compassion is somewhat new to me. I am in the process of learning to be kind to myself and to approach setting goals with self-compassion. To approach myself with compassionate curiosity as I learn to understand more of who I am and, and who God has made me to be.

I read a book some months ago called Try Softer by Aundi Kolber. And it brought this concept to me that I'd never heard about before, and the idea was instead of trying harder to try softer. As I continue to apply this to my life and reflect on it, I can see a lot of ways where I push myself to try harder.

I don't have a lot of self-compassion or kindness or gentleness toward myself when it comes to goal setting or areas of growth or improvement. Even when it comes to executing things in my daily life, I tend to be pretty hard on myself, or at least I used to be. I'm working to change that.

In Matthew 22, Jesus is teaching. And in verse 37, he teaches the greatest commandment to love the Lord your God, with all your heart and with all your soul, and with all your mind. And then in verse 39, he says,

"a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself." (Matthew 22:39)

I wonder what that would really look like for me to love my neighbor the way that I love myself? I wonder if that would be less love than what I currently have for my neighbor, if that would be less kind, less gracious, or less compassionate. I want to elevate the way that I care for those around me if I were to love them the way that I love myself. And so, I'm in this process of building self-compassion, that I would treat myself with kindness.

In 2 Corinthians 12, Paul is talking about the thorns in his side. Picking it up in verse 8, it says

"Three times I pleaded with the Lord about this, that it should leave me. But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me." (2 Corinthians 12:8-9)

I often remove myself from circumstances that require self-compassion and that allow for Christ's power to be at work in me, in this way. I remove opportunities for God's grace to be sufficient if I remove myself from areas where I need to be kinder to myself. Where I need to allow God's grace toward me to abound because I've reached my own limits or faults and shortcomings or growth opportunities. And so today we're bringing this conversation of self-compassion to God and asking him what this would look like for us to walk in it in a greater measure as we navigate our days.

And so, here's our question:

God, in what ways have you shown me compassion and grace, when I've been hard on myself?

I know he has things he wants to share with you and greater grace and compassion that you'll get to walk in and receive for yourself.

Have a good talk.

And if you've been encouraged by this content, please share it with a friend and help them grow in their conversational relationship with God too!

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